Friday, March 16, 2007

Looking back

In most of the cases that I write in this blog, I do not have the slightest idea how to begin. At first I just try to get my "flow" with the ideas, let the words appear on the screen and then I come up with something and I enjoy the process. When I read back my blog entries, I realized that those that I really like are the ones that was a result of this process. And so here it goes again.

There are about three days before the graduation of the Class of 2007. I spent half of the day standing one the field today practicing the parade for the turn-over ceremonies this sunday. As for me, I will go on as the Personnel Officer of the Company (that's the Company S1 in military terms). Having gone through so many different experiences as a cadet there are so many things that I have learned and perhaps as the academic year is moving towards its conclusion, I might as well look back and reflect on the things that have happened.

My fondest memory as a PMA cadet to date is being a squad leader to my seven plebes during summer camp. Not that the three plebes I had on the regular semester were less significant, its just that they were the first and somehow first times just stand out. It was there how I learned to appreciate how hard it is to let go of the things that they have believed in before they become cadets. It was in that experience that I learned to analyze myself more just to make sure that I really was worthy in nurturing these young dreamers. It was also with them that I learned the value of doing my best especially when people are depending on you. In the more than a month that I was with them, I have developed a sense ownership on how their lives will turn out knowing that I have been a part of their experience as plebes. I can not guage at this point whether or not I really was successful in making them better people than when they first met me, but I know that they made me a better person after our experience together and for that I will forever be thankful.

Of course, there is this daunting reality of the responsibilities that are set before me. Somehow, I could say that the whole cadet training is geared towards a time when each cadet will realize how much responsibility he will be carrying and the things that he is being prepared for. I am constantly haunted by wrong decisions that I might make that may kill my subordinates. On another end, I am also looking forward to having another person totally depend his life to the decisions that I will make. I guess, that is how the will to lead is developed and somehow, in my short and little experience as a leader inside the country's leading leadership laboratory, my idea of these things is quite good and I am happy for that.

In my personal life, things are becoming more serious. Not that I wasn't too interested in developing my personality before, its just that these days, I am believing that I have a more mature disposition on how things should be in my life. I am 24 years old and I should be thinking maturely. I guess life does come in stages and for my part, I am on that stage when I want my life to have a clear direction.

There are many things that come to me even as I try to compose my thoughts regarding the year that has passed but I guess the more important point in all of it is that I have become a better person and that I learned things that will be useful to me in the future. I think now that for all people, our direction should always be better may it be in little things or in the generaly sense of the the things that we do. I can only say these things for my life and others may not really believe in me, but the point is I am happy with what I have become through the years. I may not be the perfect person but I know I am taking advantage of living the adventure of life.

Today is 16 March 2007 and there will be more wonderful years and with this blog as my witness I can just be thankful to God Almighty for continuously guiding my life. Let's move on to my last year as cadet... Let us keep on praying.... I love you people....

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