HELP!!!

Nawawala ang ATM ko wala akong pangload.....

News and other things

Since most of my upperclassmen are now in Manila for the Independence Day parade, I had the rare opportunity of being able to watch news on the TV. Of course, knowing the kind of atmosphere in the government now is not something to be happy about, compounded by alleged destabilization plots, I kind of enjoyed knowing the things that are happening outside my realm. Being able to know these things gives me that guidance to do more of my duty here as a cadet rather than be mediocre and waste the people's money.... Well thoughts and more thoughts.

On other matters, I am expressing my disgust over one article that is in the latest issue of the Corps Magazine. I really believe that media is an important element of society. I also believe that even in the military when obedience and protocol is the way of life, the freedom of expression should be cultivated but in proper avenues that will not destroy the very foundation of the organization. Inasmuch as I brutally react to ills of the organization that I am a part of in the way I write my opinions, I also understand that first and foremost I must do my role as part of this organization learning from both the positive and negative so that as my influence becomes greater and my responsibility becomes more tremendous, I will be guided by this things; doing the positive and putting an end to the negative. My role now is to learn how it is to lead positively, whatever my opinion is, it is my attempt to express myself and be true, but it does not in anyway affect my performance of the soldier of the land. With this in consideration, I daresay that even in the military institution, the use of the pen is of much responsibility as that of leadership as a whole.

The article I am complaining about was about the position of an upperclass over a recent maltreat case here in the academy. The writer who was the upperclass' company mate somehow used the respectable Corps Magazine as his vehicle to defend the upperclass which I think is now in the process of being discharged. That is the first thing that disgust me. It's a cheap way of defending oneself over a very controversial case. This is also not to discount the fact that the magazine is to be distributed even to civilians who do not have any idea on the prevailing doctrine of PMA regarding maltreatment. And of course, the obvious, what does the people have to do with this case? Secondly, it is assumed on that write-up, that the upperclass was telling the truth and the plebe was definitely a liar on the premise that the upperclass had years of experience living under the umbrella of the Honor Code as a cadet, while the plebe was a cadet only for two weeks, which makes his word weak when it comes to truthfulness. The article is simply implying that those who go to the Philippine Military Academy are not honorable and that they learn to be honorable only in PMA which is very much false. He disregards the at least 17 years of value formation that the plebe has gone through as a civilian which is very much unfair. And finally, the article alone is full of bias and hatred which is not supposed to be a character of someone who is involved in responsible journalism. My point is this, I do not know the circumstances behind that controversial case nor do I care to find out. I pity the upperclass who is on his way out because of such case. But, whatever the outcome of that case maybe, it is bad, as in very bad, practice to use a respectable publication as a tool to expose seemingly fallacious arguments that I think will even degrade the quality of opinion the Corps magazine is expected of. It is not for any cadet to make the matter more controversial because the case is still under investigation. I do not side with any of the parties involved and I abhor maltreatment in any way, but the point is that when we try to use means that are improper to promote our interests our opinions, this becomes a tragedy and something that is not expected of a cadet who is paid by taxpayers more than five hundred thousand pesos a year. I'm talking to the opinion editor about this, I just can't stand that the publication I am writing for can publish a kind of article like that.

And finally my gripes are over. If you want to read the article I am referring to just find the latest Corps Magazine, I am not glorifying that article by placing a copy in my website....

The things that you read

I little while back I had the chance to read the latest Reader's Digest. Of course, considering that I haven't read for quite sometime, I mean read those that I like to read, I devoured it. I realized how much I have been missing not knowing who Charles Cullen is and that there are actually scientists who call themselves Glaciologist. Well, after having some laughs and a mixture of emotion on how the drug dixogin (or doxigin???) can kill people, I started to think about things, you know the kind of thinking when I eventually come up with my bright ideas and appear so wise at things. Considering that the firstclass are going to Manila and Cebu in the next hour, I kind of shifted my mind to the life I had when I came here. Actually, I envied them ( the firsclass) since they will actually be going someplace where I have so many memories, either in Cebu or in Manila. It brought me to think about the "wonderful" life I had as a carefree civilian. Going anywhere I want, doing whatever it is that comes to mind. Laughing boisterously without caring about the world. I reminisced the pure joy of just being yourself and not being part of this rigorous routine where so much is expected of me. A life where the world is not waiting for me to commit a mistake but rather I am just some nobody who is simply a part of statistics. A life where I do not have to worry about learning rectilinear motion and trying to beat the bugle sound wearing my best uniform. Of course, a life where I can simply ignore people that I do not like (like annoying upperclassmen) But then everytime I complain about this things, I realized that nobody really forced me to be here. In fact, at some point they tried to shoo me away from this place but I insisted on coming back and now this is what I got. When I think about all the things that I have given up just to have that Cadet before my family name, somehow I'm confused. But later on I understand that the feeling that I have is only because of the loneliness I feel trying to cope up with my day to day routine. Maybe because of the feeling that I am missing so much in the world outside this halls, to think I do not even have an idea what Full House is all about. But then I also realized that the little joys I gathered from reading the latest Reader's Digest to blogging in front of a government owned Compaq computer kind of allows me to think about the things regarding my life, regarding my choice of, as they say, "serving the country." It allows me to understand that the dreams are not that easy to achieve. It allows me to realize that rectilinea motion whether I like it or not will have to be learned so that I can be what I dreamed to become. Life is an adventure and my adventure now is somehow becoming lonely but then it is still an adventure and its for me to enjoy it.

So, reading actually has allowed me to get in touch with my self and somehow retrospect between my life as a "carefree" civilian to being a man in uniform. It is a way of reminding me of the reality of life. Finally it is a way of reminding me that I just need to stop thinking too much, it gets really really lonely. Well, as I end this piece, maybe I'll feel some relief, I hope....

Ang Gugmang Giatay

I can be poetic at times... this is visayan just ask someone to translate it for you :)

Ganiha ang among istorya

Kabahin sa iyang hinigugma

kay nganong dili kasulti,

ambot, ingon ana ra man pirmi

karon na pod pag tan-aw nako sa friendster

gugma gihapon ang ingon sa akong sister

naunsa naman ning mga tawo

gugma na lang sige, way klaro

mao nang nakasulat na lang ko

ug balak nga wala ko kabalo kung unsay ayo

basta mao ni sya mga pangahitabo

kabahin sa gugmang giatay ambot kung unsay mahitabo

It really can't be bad all the time

I got my Unit Exam paper in Calculus earlier today and I did pass, in fact my score was quite good considering that my classmate who was so good at the subject flunked that exam, so its not that bad all the time after all. I'm just happy considering the hang ups that I have been encountering with this subject in the past days. It was a good feeling at least it somehow softens the effect of the exam that I think I failed last week. Anyway, the good thing about this is that it gives me that hope that I do understand the lessons after all and that gives me more confidence when I take the final exams by the end of the month which I'm proud to say might just be my only final exam for the semester... YAHOO!!! Although I might not make it to Dean's list this semester because of Calculus but nevertheless I will be able to go on break come first week of July and that's a good thing... I'm going to Dumaguete and San Carlos... YAHOO again...

The Corps Magazine is out, at least a limited copy was released to the Corps yesterday, and sad to say the short story that I wrote supposedly for someone was not published. Although 3 out of the 4 articles I wrote were published, which is good, I just can't be that glad about the non publication of that short story since I really wanted it published more than the other three that were published. I just have to contend myself with publishing that story on my website or maybe try again come next issue. Of course, I'll have new ideas then and that short story might loose its "taste". Well at least most of my articles were published and as early as now I am already hearing some comments about the "boldness" of my articles... too bad I'm the writer..... hehehe

Well, I have reasons to be happy about and thank God the world is round!!!