And then there's the derivatives

It seems that all that I am posting about this past days are all about Calculus, of course it is a major concern for me because that subject alone will determine my stay in my beloved Philippine Military Academy. With my deficiency down to less than 5 points in a few days I will be texting again. But then the subject has taken its toll. Have I been proficient I would be going down to manila this weekend.... sayang!!!

Anyway we just started with derivatives today and I'm planning to study the whole afternoon after this.... grabe this is me and I'm not joking... of course that is after I write my letter to my friend.... anyway I'll study now......

It's going down

This is the situation. Initially, I had 13 deficiency points and considering that I am now off limits to my cellphone, I promised myself that I will get back at Calculus for denying me of the privilege of texting my friends and those that I want to be friends..... Well, I gave myself two weeks but it seems its going to be less, as of the moment I have 10.4, its approaching the single digit figure and I still have another LE which I'm so confident that I had a 10.0 then there is the Unit Exam tomorrow. So, if all goes well, I'm bidding goodbye to the deficiency list by next week. And so I go back to my blog cheerfully declaring that I am winning the war... yes... Its going down.....

You also notice the new lay-out. This is actually because of a project in my MIS class and I made my website my project so I just have to incorporate the other things. Anyway, that's it for now.... in a few more days I'll be texting again :)

All out war against Calculus

Our Tactical Officer talked to the thirdclass cadets tonight shortly after Evening call to quarters (ECTQ) and the main topic was about the alarming deficiency rate of my class in Calculus. My instructor revealed today that 70% of my class is deficient in the subject and I predict that may still rise in the coming days. Only around 30 cadets in my class out of about 260 total strength has a grade that is passing in the subject and some are just clinging on to that elusive 7.0. My tactical officer made new policies to force us to study, all privileges are cancelled and the saddest thing of it all is that we are not allowed to use our cellphones unless we become proficient. As of today, I have lessened my deficiency from 13 to 11 which is a feat in itself as most of my classmates are accumulating more and more with each lesson exam. Needless to say, this is a problem that is very great in magnitude as in great to the point that even the Superintendent is alarmed. If this continues, by next semester my class will be massacared.

I really do not feel good about all these things. For one, I know that I am good at math, the only reason that I am deficient is simply because I did not take this matter seriously and now it came to this point that I will have to be deprived of certain privileges that are the few things that make me smile in this part of the world. I am not panicking for I know that I will eventually end up victorious over calculus, I'm also hoping that I'll still make it to Dean's list. Of course, that is still to distant to think about. Right now I have to continue studying. I am declaring an all out war agains Calculus. I will show no mercy to that subject and I'll prove to them who's better. I earned my way to be here, with my stripe on my sleeves, I'm living my dream and its not Calculus that will take away that dream. I'll give them a battle that they will surely be defeated...... This is an all out war--- And I'm still smiling

I just got deficient

Before I begin my sonata on my frustration on getting failing exam results let me give you a background of the way cadets are graded. You see, cadets are using a 10 point grading system. In this grading system 7 is the passing. So in our Lesson Exams (we callin LE's) which is usually ten points you must get 7 to pass. If you get only six that makes you deficient by one point, so to catch up you have to get at least 8 on the next LE for your grade to be tangent (meaning, just barely passing) so if you get a 0.0 in one LE you would have to get two perfect LEs plus an 8. So you see if you fail in consecutive LEs chances are you will have a very hard time trying to catch up and probably you'll end up being discharged or turn-back. And so my frustration really is because of the two LEs that were just returned in my Calculus class. In my previous entry, I was so proud because I was one of the few cadets who were not deficient in any of the subjects, now its all of us. But my frustration is not really on that, its because when I scrutinized my paper there were so many points that they could have added if they just checked it properly, I mean one point is already something that I will be happy about. I hate to think that the Department of Mathematics simply are so inconsiderate in checking papers that they do not realize the magnitude of deducting even a point to my already tangent grade. That is the reason why in most cases the most dreaded subject really is Mathematics, and its not because were not good at Math, mind you when I was enrolled in a civilian college, I only go to class during exams but still I had the biggest grade for Algebra, the reason really is that aside from the so many pressures we have to deal with as cadets, we have to deal with a standard that is 70% for a passing grade plus some inconsiderate instructors. Well, I can go on and on doing my litany of frustrations but the fact remains that I just have to try harder as in harder...... Well, wish me luck, the next time I'll make sure they won't even think of deducting a point.......

Just thought of blogging

Last April 8 when I was on informal leave and I was walking around Cubao area, I went into this bookstore that has a lot of books. Actually I was looking for another copy of Da Vinci Code to replace my father's copy which I lent to an upperclass. Anyway, I spent about 1500 on books from that bookstore and aside from Da Vinci Code, I bought an anthology of Philippine Short Stories written by authors of this century. I bought the book because at that time I was fascinated with short stories plus I have a subject right now on Philippine Literature so I felt that book might help me; of course my usual liking for reading so a compilation of short stories might just give me the variety I need. Anyway, I wrote my short story for the Corps Magazine and somehow the events kind of introduced me to a new world where I think I can play to. I became so engrossed with thinking about plots of story that I want to write. So, I actually developed this liking to writing short stories, exploring the countless possibilities that its world can offer. I have decided to make another website where I can post the stories that I wrote and then possibly ask for comments maybe that way I'll improve my way of writing who knows, I just might win a Palanca in the future hahaha... again I'm dreaming but it could happen.

I also was able to get in touch to yet another one of the important ladies in my life. I saw her sister's account in friendster and from that I was able to get her number. Basically, I just like the feeling that I'm getting in touch with her although as before shes not really into texting and inasmuch as I want to call her, I have no money. Well, the reason why I am sharing this is that I really like the feeling of meeting people again. I bet if I'll meet her when I go on break we'll have a lot to talk about especially about the things that have happened to our lives since the last time we saw each other around 4 years ago. Before I forget, she is an important lady in my life because she taught me so many things about love, women and even relationships, I guess she does not know that maybe I'll tell her when I see her again, akala nya lang siguro I was just madly in love with her then. I hope she reads this.....

I'm being haunted again by the seemingly immature antics of some of the people in this Academy. Well, I just have to deal with the fact that although they seem to lack the breeding that is expected of them as the country's the best and the brightest, they still are my senior and leadership entails that one also knows obedience. I'm asking my classmates how to deal with this new development and my convictions stands still, I won't give him the chance to prove to himself that what he is doing is the right thing. I hope he also reads this.

I just learned today that I am one of the few who is still not deficient in any of our subjects. This morning we had our first major exam in Calculus and I think I answered that exam quite well, but of course I still have to wait for the results. Anyway, I want to go on privilege, at least now I know that I earned it because I'm not deficient not unlike before when most of my classmates went out so that they can maximize before the red grades starts to massacre our ranks. I do not know where to go well, I'll think of something.

And so this is it for now I hope to write some food for thought again rather than the "happenings" of my life. I think some wisdom that I derive from the experiences that I have.... Oh before I forget let us offer a one minute prayer to the late 2Lt Fabia who died this morning in an ambush, he was my classmate... may he rest in peace....