Waiting...

I'm waiting for a file to be uploaded to my Yahoo Briefcase account so I decided to write something. Well waiting can be a bit of a hassle when you just want to sleep. In my case, in a little while I will be posting as a guard again, some duty that I just have to do but I dread the most. In another window, I have an essay to make that will be submitted tomorrow. I finally realized that it's boring here. I have so much to do, very little time and extremely lonely. So here I am again trying my best to regain a positive outlook and leave all the negative energy I have now as I write my thoughts.

When I think about the things that have happened in my life, I can not help it but sometime be tired of the fact that there is still so much to do and I still have to continue trying. Try to imagine this, I am 22 years old and in a few months I'll be turning a year older. I graduated high school in 1998, that goes to say that most of my contemporaries has somehow made a life out of their lives while I try my best not to breakdown inside PMA. I miss so many people and wanted to do so many things and yet I can not do them, I still have to wait for the end of this semester at the same time study hard so that I can have that vacation. Of course, that is discounting the fact that I do not have a lovelife whatsoever, while my room mates have lots and lots of "friends" other than their girlfriends. I'm beginning to think that life is being hard on me. Well, I do know that my feelings now will eventually evaporate and then I'll just go back to my real self and be happy and contented with what I have. The truth is I suddenly felt how lonely it is to be here; surrounded by so many people where all they do is either to give orders to me or take orders from me. People who, like me, are also trying their best not to be lonely. I guess this is just how it should be for me in the next couple of years or maybe luck will just be with me. I simply do not know. I guess sometimes when we want something we just have to continue on trying to achieve it even when sometimes it becomes lonely. Well, I think that's it for now anyone who can help me about my feeling kindly get in touch...