I am apprehensive to write this post. I just feel that if I write very often some people may not be able to read the other posts and to think this is just some random update that I wish to do since I really do not have something to write in my mind. I just came from a major exam and I felt this could be a good way to unwind.
This morning I was shocked when my squadmate (a plebe) suddenly turned white while we were having mess. I gave him something "hot" as a punishment for not complying an order a gave him yesterday. Apparently he was not someone who is able to tolerate the "hotness" of the stuff I gave him and he just became pale. He started to slouch complaining that his stomach was painful. I tried coercing him until finally I threatened him of giving him another set of that "hot" stuff I gave him earlier and finally he corrected his posture. I do not wish to grosse out people of the reality of what we do here. I just wanted to give the impression of how things are done here. It may not be something that people will agree on but it is the system that we do. After that, I brought them somewhere and gave my speech on what is it that I wanted to to do. I expressed how I feel bad about the fact that they do not trust that I am doing the right thing in training them. I told them that my job is not to please them but to bring out the traits necessary for an effective and professional soldier. I was very emotional while talking to them because I really wanted them to understand why some things had to be done. I wanted to show that despite of how uncomfortable the way things are, it is part of training and unless they understand that they will not become the soldiers that we wish them to become. I again asked them to trust that I am doing what it is that I have to do. As I walked back to my barracks, I was just hoping that they understood what I meant. When we take our lunch this afternoon, I will continue to scrutinize what they do and continue to hope.
This morning I was shocked when my squadmate (a plebe) suddenly turned white while we were having mess. I gave him something "hot" as a punishment for not complying an order a gave him yesterday. Apparently he was not someone who is able to tolerate the "hotness" of the stuff I gave him and he just became pale. He started to slouch complaining that his stomach was painful. I tried coercing him until finally I threatened him of giving him another set of that "hot" stuff I gave him earlier and finally he corrected his posture. I do not wish to grosse out people of the reality of what we do here. I just wanted to give the impression of how things are done here. It may not be something that people will agree on but it is the system that we do. After that, I brought them somewhere and gave my speech on what is it that I wanted to to do. I expressed how I feel bad about the fact that they do not trust that I am doing the right thing in training them. I told them that my job is not to please them but to bring out the traits necessary for an effective and professional soldier. I was very emotional while talking to them because I really wanted them to understand why some things had to be done. I wanted to show that despite of how uncomfortable the way things are, it is part of training and unless they understand that they will not become the soldiers that we wish them to become. I again asked them to trust that I am doing what it is that I have to do. As I walked back to my barracks, I was just hoping that they understood what I meant. When we take our lunch this afternoon, I will continue to scrutinize what they do and continue to hope.
Last night, I had a nice time exchanging text messages with a good friend who was a wife of an upperclass. My fondness to that exchange was brought about by my interest to validate some of the theories I have about my so called lovelife (entry just before this one). I did have so many insights/ For her, I think she was just reminiscent of her own love story and how she ended up being married to someone of my own kind. I guess we do have something in common and I could sense her fascination to the replies I have on her inquiries. I think we will be having more of that exchange in the days to come.
My life is normal spiced up with wonderful things that are slowly revealing itself as I go on. I like the way things are going on, so many plans are on my mind and I continue to blog about all of it. I guess that is the beauty of this blog, we just do not know what comes next...
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